These past couple of weeks have been amazing. You have come to me in visions, dreams and been speaking to me. I know You are always in teacher mode, but I feel like I have finally sat down in Your class, started listening and taking notes. I don’t want these notes to just be pencil marks in my journal, I want to become the notes. God, I pursue with all of my heart, to be Your good student. I want to make You proud.
I woke up to the sound of my alarm. I slid off of the bunk bed to turn it off and fell on my futon. I layed sprawled out on the futon for a couple of minutes. My body and mind were already drained. I had no energy and motivation to go to my morning class. My roommate, Sara, was asking me questions and they just ricocheted off of me. I was too tired to talk. Finally, I got up from the futon and walked over to my desk and just stood there.
As I slumped over my desk, something shot at my spirit. It was like a flame of energy, launched into my spirit. Right away, I felt an energy sprawl all over my body. I was over filling with energy that was inside of me. I believe God shot me with His energy and woke me up! I was not just physically awaken, but spiritually as well. When I received this energy, I instantly thought to myself, there is so much I have to do today. There are many people that I needed to talk about Jesus. I needed to shine the light. I needed to do it for God!
God gave me His energy and I did not know I needed it. I did not pray for energy, but He knew I needed it. There is nothing that comes close to the energy that God gave me. With this energy, I felt extremely motivated reach out to God’s children. He stirred something in my spirit.
I went to Chi Alpha that day. I was writing in my journal, documenting everything that happened with this energy. God told me to pray over people at Chi Alpha. He wanted me to pray for FIRE! It is better to give than to receive. I thought this was very cool that I am able to pray the energy that God gave me and to pray it over someone. You literally are transferring over something that God has given you to build up the Church. We are called to build up the Church. Encourage and love one another. I prayed over Juliana, Amanda, AJ, Phil, Sharnea, Sara, Andy, and Nate. I wanted to spread the fire that God gave me.
When we got back from Chi Alpha, Nate, Sharnea, Sara, and Drew were in my room. We were just talking and I felt I needed to pray for Nate. When placed my hands on Nate’s back, I prayed for fire. I felt my arms tingle down to my fingertips and actually felt it transfer to Nate’s back. I have never felt anything like that before! I did not want to stop the prayer, so I kept on praying. I kept feeling heat. My prayer was that Nate could feel this heat. I prayed that he could feel uncontrollable and uncontainable fire that I felt the whole day. I prayed it would not just be in this moment, but tomorrow and forever he would feel this fire.
I do not know if I finished praying or not, but Nate said he felt so much warmth that traveled throughout his back and I think his arm. I thought that was so amazing! That prayer transferred fire! It transferred to Nate and he felt it. I just prayed for more and more fire. I seriously do not know how to describe this fire. You are all jittery and joyful. His energy truly motivates you! I could not sit still and allow His energy to stay within me. I needed to spread and do something with It!
Do not be afraid to ask God for something. Sometimes He answers prayers that were never even said. He watches over His children and knows what is best for them! Our Teacher is teaching us. We must take notes and implement them. Shine the gifts God has given you and show the world.
This is about the body and blood, the Eucharist. It actually doesn’t matter if you think the body and blood is actually Jesus or not. The same outcome happens. If you think it actually is Jesus, then you take his real body and blood, and it’s not just a symbol now, and you remember what He did for you and that you are in constant communication or communion with Him. If you believe that it is just a symbol, then when you take it, and it is actually his body and blood, then you are taking the real body and blood whether you believe it or not. All we need to know is that Jesus died for us and we take communion or break bread to remember what He did and that we are in constant communion with Him. Communion literally means sharing thoughts and feelings. That is what we do with Jesus when we take the body and blood.
My roommate, Sara and I decided to play worship music while we sleep. I turned it Hillsong United on Pandora. I do not know why we have not thought of playing worship music as we slept before. The music creates a peaceful atmosphere. It allows your mind to settle down and give praise back to God, whether that is verbally or mentally. Personally, I love worship music because my soul is fixed on God and it makes me more hungry for Him.
The first night that Sara and I played worship music, I had an encounter with the Holy Spirit. I slept on the futon that night. When I was waking up, it was early hours of the morning, probably 2 or 3. I was still in the stage where you are not fully awake but can comprehend. My ears picked up the worship music, many verses were muffled, besides one verse. This is what I remembered, “Faith is ______…” and the rest of the verses were muffled. I finally opened my eyes and scanned around the room. I hear the beat of sound of the song, but could not pick up the verses. I turned onto my back, and outstretched my arm and hands. Out of nowhere I said, “Come, Holy Spirit.” My chest rose involuntarily and I passed out.
I woke up in mid-Sunday morning and tried collecting my thoughts about what occurred last night. Sara and I met Drew in the lobby for Church. On the way Church, I was telling them what happened last night. I told them that I was confused why I could not remember the third word to the only verse that I heard. No one knew why.
We were running a tad late for Church because we saw a woman hitchhiking. At first, we looked at her and passed her. Both Drew and I, silently contemplated whether or not we should have stopped. We made up of a lot of excuses why we did not stop. We rolled into the parking lot of Bemidji Baptist Church, and I told him that we are turning around. We headed back in the direction of the woman. We passed the spot where she was originally standing, and she was not there. We scanned the whole area. The reason why I passed the woman hitchhiking was because I could give her nothing. I did not have any money or food on me. But, when we passed the spot again where she no longer stood, I thought, I could have given her Jesus. I thank God everyday that He sent me to Bemidji and showed me the path to get to small group, Chi Alpha and Kings. His love that I am seeking is building my faith everyday. I continue to pursue my Father’s heart. Not everyone is aware of how precious it is to have a relationship with the Father. Many fall into the world. This means they resort to earthly pleasures and sin to fulfill the emptiness in their heart and soul. This is not what we were created to be. We are in the world, but we must not act like or become it. We must persevere with God to bring Heaven down to earth. There is no room for hesitation or doubt. If God convicts You to do something, obey Him.
Since the woman hitchhiker, I have prayed for no more hesitation. God knows the Beginning and the End. He has already seen what happens down the road for you. He has thought it through for you! It comes down to trust. Trust Him when you can not see where the road leads.
We entered the parking lot of Bemidji Baptist Church once more and headed inside. We sat in the back and pulled out the hymn book. I randomly parted my hymn and it opened to a song called, Come, Holy Spirit (Law of the Spirit of life...have made me free). I kind of freaked out in the pew. I showed Sara and Drew what I flipped too. They just politely nodded. I started reading the hymn. I had to write some verses down:
Come as a wisdom to children
Come as new sight to the blind
Come, Lord, as strength to my weakness
Take me: SOUL, BODY & MIND
Come, Holy Spirit, I need You!
Come in Your own gentle way
Come as a dew to my dryness
Come to the withered of soul
Fill me with joy ever more
O let Your sweet healing power; touch me and make me whole
The Holy Spirit is powerful. Holy Spirit breathe on me. Let sunshine fill its in most part. Teach me in word of living flame what Christ would have me do. Until my will is lost in Thine, to live for Thee.
God has equipped you with His spirit, the Holy Spirit! Jesus came down to proclaim God’s Message. It is our duty to do the same. Take up your cross and follow Jesus! Jesus modeled it for you. He taught the simplicity behind the Message: to love God and your neighbors.
We were heading back to campus when Drew mentioned that he thought about what the third word could have possible been. He elaborated that faith is multiple things.
Faith is having complete trust in God and knowing His plan is the best for you. Faith is walking into darkness but showing the darkness you carry a radiating light. Faith is constantly communicating with God. Faith is letting God have control.
Christ meant it when He died for our sins! He paved the way for us. I know I deserve nothing, but He gave me everything. I’m so thankful to have an Almighty Father who watches over me. I’m homesick for Heaven.
Love is having the humility to go up to anyone and pray for them because you love them. You have the key to heaven, make duplicates and give them out.
Plant seeds slowly
I was just drifting into a nap and asked God that I wanted to know how to relate to one of my friends more. I have been thinking about him a lot because I feel like he is struggling with what he actually believes in. His parents are strict and he had a very rough past. He struggles with depression and does not have that many friends to lean on. I do not want to be that friend that abandons him. I told that to God. I did not want to abandon him. I did not realize that God was giving me a vision until I opened my eyes. This was the vision:
Five people were on a track, lined up at the starting line. All of them had a full bucket of seeds in their hands. Something went off because four of them sprinted with their buckets to the an empty bucket, poured it out quickly and ran back to the finish line where they had started. The four of the people that took off sprinting, did not make all of their seeds in the empty bucket. Many of them flew out onto the ground and was wasted. The fifth person held her bucket and walked to the empty bucket. Poured out all of her seeds gently so that none of them would fly out. While she was making sure that all of them made it into the empty bucket, people began mocking her for taking such a slow time. She did not let this get to her. She returned to the finish line and completed the task. She made sure that all of the seeds made it into the bucket.
God wants us to scatter His seeds, but also wants us to make sure they make it to the final destination. A job well done is when a person takes their time and puts in effort and does not care what people think, just like that women. The seeds could have also represented the fruits of the spirit. If we rush and hammer people with the Word, they will not be able to digest it or even turn away. We have to show love, joy, kindness, gentleness- it is not a race. Let's make sure that His seeds get planted properly and grow steadily.
Give nutrients to the Kingdom of God. It is not always about how many people you can reach, it is about if they can grow. We have to be there for God’s people. We can not stay quiet, because God can not work through us if we remain that way. Trust in Him that He will guide you and will not let you fail.